A MOMster Life

This is my own pregnancy tests. :) Both showed negative at first, then showed positive results five minutes after.

I may sound like some kill-joy who always sees something wrong on what was supposed to be funny, but the question here is..

Why is pregnancy used to fool people?

Is pregnancy a joke?

Is it supposed to be funny when someone's pregnant?

I just want to share a different point of view.

Some people are trying so hard to conceive. They have themselves checked for anything wrong. They prayed so hard just so they will be blessed with a child. Some find it hard to bear... Others just can't.

There are some who suffer complications during pregnancy. They had to take extra meds and do checkups more than the usual. I, myself, having Essential Thrombocytosis had to visit two different doctors in a month. There are even some who are forced to quit work. Expectant moms are willing to sacrifice their wants to make sure the baby gets what it needs.

There are a few who experienced what I think is the worst thing that could happen to anyone: losing a child. Some didn't even have the chance to see them. Others had to send their babies back to Daddy God the moment they came out. They can never get over it.

Pregnancy may have become a sensitive topic for me now that I am a mom, and most especially because I have known people who had suffered infertility, and miscarriage.

For some, they may see it as a joke. But for others, pregnancy is an answered prayer.

Pregnancy is not easy.
Pregnancy is nothing to laugh about.
Pregnancy is not a joke.

It is about having a family, about people giving their all.
Pregnancy is about life and giving life.


PS: And please people, don't even get me started with your new "I have cancer" posts!
DON'T EVER MAKE FUN OF CANCER. 

I could've kept this experience to myself to avoid people judging my parenting but I felt the need to share this so parents would be aware that what seemed to be harmless little sweets (and all those cute small objects) can actually be evil monsters in disguise.



It was a fine Saturday evening when we meet up with a couple of college buddies for some dinner and hot choco (because I can't have too much coffee).

My little girl was busy playing with her new toys. I took one piece of Mentos candy (because my hormones are telling me I should have one) and she immediately came up to me and begged for a piece, too. I gave her one.

We continued with our chit-chat's. Just when Akee walked right in front of me (btw, she was busy walking around this time), she accidentally swallowed the Mentos candy!

She didn't cry but she seemed to be gagging. We tried our best to dislodge the candy.

You could read: What to Do If Your Child Swallows Something

The waitress offered us water but my bestfriend refused to take it. She said not to let Akee drink water because this might cause more choking.

After a few seconds, Akee began to cry. Which is a good sign by the way, cause it just means her airway isn't blocked. But I got a little paranoid and I wanted to make sure the evil candy isn't there anymore so we rode all the way to the nearest emergency room.

While being on the car, Akee was already calm and said "Akee, yayay~" and we were like "Awww~"

When we reached the ER, we told the nurses of the situation. They just looked at Akee and was like "She looks fine."

But because it's me, the ever skeptical me, I wanted them to do something.. anything just so I will be at ease. They suggested to do an X-Ray scan.

Fortunately, no foreign object was found. The doctor said that because the candy was circular, it would have easily "fall" into the stomach. She said to give Akee her milk and if she does not throw up, then she is totally fine.

I felt so relieved and grateful that nothing so serious happened. Since that night, I always make sure that everything she puts in her mouth is well sliced, even removing almonds from chocolates. And of course, no more Mentos candies.

Another monster could be an itsy bitsy little bead. My niece picked up a bead and accidentally stuck it inside her nose.

It was another trip to the ER and the bead was taken out in a few minutes.

You could read: What to Do When Something Gets Stuck in the Nose

These traumatic experiences made me realize that small objects (even candies) and toddlers shouldn't go together! I mean that's why some toys had a warning label "Not suitable for children under 3 years old". (Yeah, I learned a valuable lesson not to ignore these warnings).

I examined all of Akee's toys, took all the small ones and kept them somewhere out of reach from the children.

My niece also promised never to play with beads and small objects anymore. I'm grateful that kids are smart and could learn from these accidents, too. :)

I stumbled upon a video on Facebook wherein a mother (or she could be the nanny but everyone assumed she was the mother) puts her child on the changing diaper table. Something caught her attention and so she turned her back for a few seconds. The child then rolled over and fell off the table. The older brother's spider sense tingled and he caught the baby! The mother hugged them both, thankful that the baby was unharmed and proud of her older son who acted as a hero.

Now, instead of the netizens celebrating how heroic the elder child is and actually be thankful that the baby is fine, they were busy bashing and criticizing how irresponsible the mother is. She should have never left the baby on the table and nothing should have took her attention away from the baby.

In the mother's defense, there were also a few people who said things like this could happen anytime and they're sure that the mother has learned her lesson so there's no need for people to be too hard on her.

So the question is: Would it make you an irresponsible parent if your child gets hurt?

I asked myself the same question a few months back. Little Akisa was playing around and basically showing off her dress to her uncles and auntie. I specifically told her not to get near the electric fan while I was busy preparing our stuff (we were going out that day). While I was not looking at her, she just kept on running in and out of the room. Suddenly, I just heard her screamed. She accidentally had her fingers scratched with the fan blades. Fortunately enough, the blades were made of plastic so it didn't (God forbid!) cut her finger, but it still hurts.

When my friends knew about it, they immediately said I was too irresponsible. I know they were joking but it still hit me. Was I really an irresponsible parent because my daughter got a scratch? Well, I know it wasn't just a scratch, and I can't reason out "I was busy." or "I already told her not to go near it." It just wouldn't sound right.

Back when Akee just learned to walk, she didn't want me to hold her. She'd keep on pulling her hand so I'd let her go. So I allowed her to walk on her own while I was walking beside her.

She lost balance.
I wasn't fast enough.
She bumped her head.

She's got a huge bukol on her forehead and I blamed myself for letting go of her little hands.

Here's a photo of little Akisa with that bump on her forehead.

Going back to when my friends called me "irresponsible", I messaged my bestfriend and asked her if I was indeed irresponsible.

To give you a background of what kind of person she is, she loves good laughs and is super crazy! She'd do the silliest of things and she's loud and frank and bold and crazy! Oh, did I mention she is crazy? (Haha, love you, dae XD)
I expected her to give me a long sermon or the craziest of advice but then, I guess she's grown mature enough that she actually gave a decent answer.

Am I an irresponsible parent if my child gets hurt?

She said that parents aren't perfect. There will always be a time when our little ones would get hurt. They will get scratches and wounds. They'll fall on their knees. They'd get bumps on their heads. But that's one way for them to learn.

They got hurt because they played with the electric fan? Then next time, they'll be sure not to play with it anymore.
They fell because they lost balance? Then they'll learn to get back up and walk again more carefully this time.

Things like wounds and bumps on the head aren't unavoidable especially if your child is too energetic and curious. The important thing is to be with them and make sure they'll be okay if they got hurt.

Everyone is perfect and much better parents until they actually have a child on their own.

So instead of dwelling on what everyone says about me as a parent, I should be more focused on what I should do as a parent for my daughter. It's how my little Akisa looks at me that matters, anyway.


When I get home from work, Akee keeps on blabbering stuff like she's telling me how her day has been.
She kisses me every time I pout my lips. She hugs me when I tell her I want some love.

So, I guess my little girl didn't hold any grudges or did not at least blame me for the huge bump on her forehead or the scratches on her fingers.

Am I a responsible parent?

I'll let my little Akisa decide on that. 😊

Going out of Never Land has offered me lots of challenges and responsibilities. And one of those responsibilities is to have a little child who would mean the world to me.

As a parent of a toddler, every time we decide to have a nice walk outdoors or even a quick stroll at the mall, it is very important to make sure that we bring everything we nee-..
uhm.. Let me rephrase that. *coughs*
It is very important to make sure that we bring everything our little girl needs.

For the first few months of being a parent, going out of the house has become stressful for me especially since I have to carry double of what I usually bring. I felt like I needed to bring everything! From diapers to clothes to sleeping mats and pillows... well yea. Basically, if I could just bring the whole house just to make sure I don't forget anything, I would.



Now that little Akisa isn't so little anymore, I learned that I need not bring the whole closet. I just have to carefully think what stuffs are really necessary.

Here is my own personal list of things to bring on a typical day out with a toddler.

Diapers

It is very important to bring an extra pair of diapers because you'll never know when they would feel the need to answer nature's call. As for me, I've been really lucky since my little girl really does her business at home. 😊 But sometimes, if it's a long day out, it's really necessary to change her diapers since this could cause rashes and irritation.

I used to bring five or six extra diapers but then I never really used that much. So now I'm just bringing two or three.

Milk, water and baby bottle

Since Akee still drinks milk, I had to prepare three (3) servings of milk, and of course her baby bottle. Some kids prefer their milk warm. I'm lucky *again* that Akee is fine with lukewarm milk. There are times I don't bring water, though, because it is additional weight. But I would buy one outside. Well.. yea, it's kinda confusing since buying outside still does give additional things to carry but whatever. 😀

Bib or small hanky

Toddlers can be very messy during mealtime so thank God for bibs and hankies! 😀

Wet wipes

Very useful especially during changing of diapers.
And in the absence of a bib or a hanky, wet wipes will do.😉

Extra clothes